We are a polarity of being.
Our left-brain leaves us lost in endless thoughts, conflicts, planning, chatter, arguing, cognitive processing, deducing and judging. We need this part of us, but it can take over leaving us exhausted – not seeing the forest for the trees.
Our right-brain is the intuitive part of us, filled with inspiration, creativity and perspective. This part of you accesses the quiet inner space that is just you, knowing. It is the part of you who remembers who you were before you were taken over (Yes, I speak to you, victim on the way to survivor.) We need both aspects in balance: that is what the Yin and Yang is about.
Abusers tend to get caught up in their own beliefs, promoting tricky manipulative techniques, twisting and turning– loosing contact with layers of truth that do not fit into the mind view and ego demands of the abuser. Can you allow truths beyond your ego? Can you release with humility the rigid, controlling world-view? If not, you are lost. You are not only lost to your “victim” but to yourself as well.
Victims can get equally caught up in the world of assumptions, projections, distortions of the abuser – and eventually can develop an overwhelming inner rant of defense, anger and retort to the false accusations and projections. If the poison is taken in it turns to toxic self-hate.
It can get so intense inside that there is no room for perspective or a larger world view. There is no room to listen to that small inner voice since it is overwhelmed by the bully voice and the argument with the bully.
How do you find your Lost Self?
The solution lies hidden, embedded in the problem: if you quiet the raging argument, defense or self hate, can you then hear your true Self speaking?
At times you may wonder: Do I have the Ability to Change?
What does it take to change? This is not easy, but it is possible with work. It takes systematic introspection, self-scrutiny and courage! True creative freedom and personal liberty are the goals. By moving deep within yourself and loosening the hold that the abuser has on your mind you are able to discover your own truths.
Our emotions are so powerful. They can hijack our brains and minds. Dr. Candice Pert is one of the leading researchers of the physiological nature of emotion. In her book “Molecules of emotion: Why you feel the way you feel” she provides the scientific basis for the physiology of emotion and why it is diffused throughout your whole body. I won’t get too complicated here, but the bottom line that she comes to is that each cell talks to the body as a whole through chemical language. It is now understood that every cell in our body “remembers” and that these memories are stored throughout the body. The whole body remembers past feelings.
When we are traumatized in our relationship the body remembers. As soon as a word or phrase is repeated, neuronal circuits are activated. It generates a total body response bringing about a full range of physical and emotional responses. Our body as a whole responds unconsciously to these triggers.
Through meditation, Reiki, mindfulness, biofeedback and other stress reducing techniques you can actually enhance your capacity to change. You are the one who needs to change: you are the only one you can change. By accessing the quiet, deep you, you find the You that has been missing.
The way we choose to interpret the moment (the mind) sets in motion a set of feelings/emotions, which may result in damage to the body, or its repair and well-being. You have a choice.
I show you this Mandala. This is you with the light at the center:
You are beautiful. By taking this time for yourself you can find your true center, your core, the light within you and find your wisdom.
I will share simple techniques to help you do this. Coming soon.
I say Namaste to you – sending blessings your way,