“If I only had a Guardian Angel. Can I be my own Angel? Am I too far gone for rescue?
As I look down on myself from above, suffering and lost, I suddenly have compassion. I cry seeing the heap that I have become. I weep seeing my broken heart, the loneliness, the pain and despair.
You said I was “playing the victim.” I wasn’t playing. But I will be victim no more. My eyes are open. I see through you now. And I see through me now. The games and manipulations have lost their power as I “see” what is really happening. I am no longer available. I no longer give permission for you to sacrifice me for your false aggrandizement. I see through the guilt-tripping. I no longer get caught up in your twists and turns of thought that leave me in the dark, despairing. I return home to me.
I look down at myself and wrap myself up in a blanket of love and acceptance. Yes, I know I have made bad choices, I have acted out of weakness, out of neediness, and I have enabled you to overtake me. I know I have been reactive rather than active. I know.
No more. I do not feed your disease any more. I bathe myself in the light now. I allow the shower of love and light to bathe over and through me. I soothe myself with lullabies of love and gentleness.
Now I protect my delicate heart – yes, I am still in here – from mean spirit and denigration. I no longer give permission.
I take time now to honor myself in all that I am and commit to cleansing, building and reinforcing the essence of who I am. No one can take that which I do not willingly give.
I reenter my body, mind and spirit. I know that I am not alone. I release the shame and instead honor the courage it takes to rise out of the ashes.
I live. I love. I am.